Quite an interesting title huh? Above is photo of some School Sisters of Notre Dame, the religious congregation I work for. Yesterday, I decided to attend a funeral for one of the sisters that passes away, one whom was recently moved to another healthcare facility in New York. Funerals are never an occasion to be happy. Sure there is a time to reflect on the life of the one who passed, but that does not discount the need to mourn for their passing I am thankful for my Catholic faith, which gives meaning to such human experiences, that death is not the final answer and the life life thereafter.
Being in attendance was a great way for me to show support for the sisters. Since starting my job (hard to believe that I am coming up on three months), I’ve been trying to find ways to learn their way life and be a part of it. Show up to this funeral seemed like a good opportunity to show support and that I really care about the sisters. There was some disconnect at the funeral, having not known Sister Mary Elizabeth who passed. As the Mass was starting, I was watching the sisters slowly finding their spots in the pews. I myself noticed the sizable gap in where they sat, those spaced that must have been filled by their sisters in the past who are now deceased. Some sat quietly while others took out a tissue to wipe the tears from their eyes.
When I was in formation as Dominican brother, I wrote a blog post about human experience and tears. I recalled a moment when Pope Francis visited the Philippines in 2014 and held a mass for a record-breaking attendance of more than six million Filipino, devout as they there, standing in the rain. A little girl walked up to Pope Francis at some point asking him why bad things (i.e. death) happen to good people. Pope Francis was struck by the question and admitted that he could not find the words to answer the little girl. Even in his homily, one that he prepared, Pope Francis found himself deviating from the script and instead speaking from his heart. He said that one cannot find the words in the such occasion of death and despair, leaving one to respond only through tears.
Though I could not respond similarly during the funeral, I’m glad that I took it upon myself to be there with the sisters in the midst of their tears. Tears speak volumes, what words can’t express. Pope Francis at the Mass said that we shed tears as a child that cries out to their parents. Mary, the mother of Jesus, shed tears quietly as she endured the the Passion of Jesus. In that uncomfortable space where our innate humanness is raw and our desire to want to “fix” the situation becomes hard to ignore, we are left to just be present to the other. These moments have taught me that there is sacredness is being present. That is precisely what we experience when we are before the Blessed Sacrament during adoration.
These vulnerable moments of human experience teaches us that there is a grace in being present with those who shed tears. We stand in solidarity with them because we bear a physical presence, being Jesus’ hands and feet to them, to show them that the tears they shed are for naught. The emotions felt in the chapel that day were strong and powerful, a testament to the life that Sister Mary Elizabeth led and left for the world in her passing. I may not have had the chance to get to know her, but being in the presence of those who were with her, her heart lived in and among those sisters, family and friends. Being present has power and grace, which Mary displayed at every moment of Jesus’ passion. Lord teach me to be present to others as Mary has, as these sisters have.
Toward the Top 